


Without His Shield

by Ashley Ω Nova (AshleyOmegaNova)



Series: Works Inspired by Sylvain and Felix's non-Azure Moon Ending [1]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Bittersweet Ending, Character Death, M/M, Minor Original Character(s), Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-20
Updated: 2020-01-20
Packaged: 2021-02-25 00:42:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22327126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AshleyOmegaNova/pseuds/Ashley%20%CE%A9%20Nova
Summary: Decades ago, Felix left with his sword and abandoned his shield. He's wandered Fódlan ever since, running from his past, his home, his feelings. As a mercenary, fighting provides him endless escapism, to the extent he doesn't even trouble himself with who's or why's. But quieting his thoughts has gotten harder as time has passed.One day, a young swordmaster appears before him seeking a battle. This is their first time meeting, but Felix feels he's been waiting for this fight forever.This work takes place in Sylvain and Felix's non-Azure Moon ending.
Relationships: Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier
Series: Works Inspired by Sylvain and Felix's non-Azure Moon Ending [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1607110
Kudos: 21





	Without His Shield

He had just felled his sixth enemy. Enemies, he'd learned, was the only word he needed; it was universal, applying to anyone standing opposite him on the battlefield. To be more specific than that would require detail and nuance that just didn't matter to him, so long as a job gave him the opportunity to focus his mind on fighting. Nuance just made it harder to lose himself in the battle.

He wiped stray blood splatter from the wrinkles on his face. Most mercenaries would by looking for a path to retirement by this point, but Felix hadn't lost a step. It had been decades since the war of unification, and since Felix had turned down succeeding his father to become a wandering sellsword. How could he succeed a man who they called the Shield of Faerghus when he'd spent the war as a sword for another nation?

That alone would be enough for Felix to abandon his title, but it was worse than that. In running from Faerghus, he had dragged Sylvain with him.

An enemy charged him on his weak arm side, briefly freeing him from his thoughts. Felix turned swiftly, and cut the man down before he could even touch Felix.

Sylvain had always been there for him, from the time they were children. During the war, it was no different; he was always there for Felix, risking his own well-being over and over for him. Sylvain was protecting Felix when he should have been protecting Faerghus. When he should have been protecting his countrymen. When he should have been protecting Rodrigue, and even Dimitri.

"If it hadn't been for me..."

Felix shook his head, trying to cast off that line of thought. Moments of reminiscence like this, uncharacteristic for his younger self, had become increasingly common for him over the years. Fighting had always been a respite from his thoughts, but even that escape was starting to fail. He turned his attention to another three enemies who hadn't made a move yet, and cut each down, barely giving each time to react.

Besides—Felix's thoughts resumed—he had always preferred the sword. Someone like him had no use for a shield. Shields are for those who will hold their ground under pressure; people like his father, who would shield an attack with his weak arm, and counter with his strong arm. But Felix, rather than shield with his weak arm, would always just use his strong arm to try to make sure that pressure never came.

Rather than hold his ground, Felix had run from his homeland, run from his feelings, run from his promise. He had run from his shield.

"You're the one mercenaries speak of. A swordsman who swiftly deals death to scores of enemies."

The voice cut clean through Felix's thoughts. He turned to its source, a raven-haired boy holding a sword. Felix hadn't noticed his approach, but he'd still announced his presence from a few yards away.

"Perhaps I am. And you are?"

"A swordmaster seeking the thrill of battle only an opponent like you can provide."

He spoke his words with a confidence unusual for one his age; Felix guessed from looking at him that he could only be about 17 or 18. The boy was a mercenary, most likely. Perhaps employed by the enemy. But he was alone, and had made no attempt to fight alongside the men Felix had slain, so he clearly wasn't devoted to the conflict itself.

Felix grinned. His blood was pumping. They'd never met, but Felix felt like he'd been waiting to fight this youth for ages. "Very well. Then let's—" There was a noise. Felix could hear galloping; from a distance away, but getting louder. Reinforcements? But it sounded like a lone horse.

A boy atop a horse strode in to view. He leapt off his mount, and rushed to the young swordmaster's side, holding a lance at the ready.

"Don't interfere," the swordmaster barked to him before the cavalier could even speak, never taking his eyes off Felix.

"Again?! So what, you're telling me to stand by and watch you die?! Is this so important to you you're willing to leave me all alone?!" The cavalier's face, framed by his medium-length blonde hair, looked weighed down by frustration and concern. Watching this, Felix felt his own frustration rising. But the swordmaster, in contrast, seemed emotionless, perfectly focused.

"Have a little faith in me," was all he offered in response. The flat tone of his voice carried no warmth, the cavalier's concern essentially unacknowledged.

Felix wondered if this was the cruel joke of a dead god. The scene before him had caused a million emotions to rush through him. Anger, shame, and especially an emotion he couldn't quite name. He could feel his innards churning, and he worried he'd lose his nerve. Yet he also wanted to fight this swordmaster more than ever.

His face contorted with anger. "If your boyfriend joins you, I'll just cut you both down!" The words exploded out of him almost unconsciously, before he could think about it.

A bright shade of red spread quickly across the cavalier's pretty face. "He's not—! I-I'm not—! We're just—!" Ignoring him, the two swordmasters charged at each other. It was impossible to tell who moved first; to each of them, it must have seemed the other did.

The sound of blades clashing rang out. Again. A third time. Felix's eye caught his opponent's shoulders drop down and right, just slightly, almost imperceptibly. He was going to attempt to pass Felix's guard with a thrust on his strong arm's side. If Felix was fast enough, he'd never get the chance; his enemy's head would be unguarded. He swung for the boy's neck.

His sword tasted blood. But only drops of it. Felix grazed the side of the boy's neck. A feint.

The next thing he was aware of was the sound of steel through flesh.

An eternity seemed to pass in a moment. His enemy unsheathed his sword from Felix's chest, pierced through his weak arm's side. Felix collapsed to the ground.

"You... You actually did it!" The cavalier's worried face melted into one of relief, then excitement. "Oh man, Asher, people are gonna tell stories about this!"

"This wasn't for fame, you fool! The battle itself is all that matters!" The swordmaster glared at the cavalier, who just averted his eyes and kept grinning.

As Felix lay bleeding out, he watched the two young men. A faint glow of familiarity burned in his eyes. He found the name for the emotion that had been surging through him the strongest. Regret.

The boy he now knew to be Asher stood over him. "That feint has brought low many whose reputations were greater than their skill." He brought a pair of fingers to the bloody wound Felix had created in the side of his neck. "But your speed nearly took off my head for it. You were everything I hoped you'd be. Thank you for the incredible fight." His face still betraying no emotion, the boy bowed slightly, in respect.

"May I make a final request?" Felix could feel himself fading. "My sword... see that it reaches Margrave Gautier."

Asher lifted the sword and examined it. Hardly something you'd find in a noble's collection, but far be it from him to question a dying warrior's wish. "I shall."

"Thank you..." It burned to try and breathe, and try as he might, he still felt short of air. "And one more thing... a piece of advice... from one who's walked the path you're now on..." Felix looked from the raven-haired swordmaster to the blonde cavalier a few feet behind him. "Treat him a bit better... keep him close... cherish him... You may not realize it... but he is your shield..."

Felix closed his eyes. Asher stood motionless over his body, his back turned to the cavalier, whose face was beginning to sink with worry again. "... Asher...?"

He turned to his companion. "Let's go back, Keith. I've lost interest in this battlefield. And I have a sword to deliver."

As the two walked away, the young raven-haired swordmaster who had sought only to lose himself in battle could faintly hear a final murmur. "I'm sorry I... couldn't keep my promise... Sylvain..." 

**Author's Note:**

> Sylvain and Felix's Support chain has really rattled around in my head since seeing it. There's a lot to unpack to their relationship, and it's had me wanting to write about them. One aspect that's been bothering me is their non-BL ending. I think it's a departure from Sylvain's character to let Felix leave on his own when he's so big on the two of them being together for the rest of their lives, and when he's always wanted to be free of his nobility anyway. But I also think I'd still be able to accept the ending if it wasn't so bleakly nihilistic. This fic is my attempt to address my latter issue, keeping the tragedy of the ending, but still allowing Felix to come to terms with his feelings.
> 
> I wrote this without a specific route in mind. While I do think certain routes (Crimson Flower) leave Felix with way more reason to emotionally shut down than others (Verdant Wind), the fact is the ending's the same on every non-Azure Moon route.


End file.
